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I Have Commitment Issues


Monday, 07.28.2014

I have commitment issues.

With my hairstylist.

I know we’re around that age where we should have someone that we continuously go back to and trust with our tresses but I haven’t found that special someone just yet.

I’m not sure what the reason is for my lack of committing.

I say it’s because I’m lazy but actually having a solid hairstylist I go back to time after time would save me the hassle and stress of finding a new person, worrying about their service and technical skills and having to hunt down the location of the salon.

I say it’s because I’m fickle but honestly, there have been haircuts and coloring jobs I’d received in the past which I’m perfectly super duper happy with.

I think the real reason is because I’m scared.

Not of the cut, which is fine.

But I’m scared about committing to the hairstylist as a person.

Everyone knows that a good stylist is a little bit about the technique but a lot about the chemistry. Whether you can click and get along with that stylist. Whether you can trust them with your relationship, life and work problems.

But I am extremely wary about entrusting a hairstylist with that aspect. (My hair on the other hand? Do whatever the hell you will with it) The whole idea of opening up to them, telling them about my day, my family, my friends… *shudder.

So anytime a hairstylist tells me, “Next time you come back, we’ll try that new highlighting technique,” I can’t help but think in my head, “It’s not you. It’s me.” and “This is not see you later. It really is goodbye. Forever.”

Do I want to eventually settle down with a good man and woman and live out the rest of my life with a blissful domesticity and a warm “Nice to see you back again,” everytime I re-enter the shampoo-scented salon? Sure… maybe one day.

But until then, I will let my hairstylist-selecting choices run as wild as as free as my long, untamed hair.

Oh wait… actually I just got a haircut. So scratch that.

 

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posted by Janice | Comments: 0 | Category Blog, Look

Why I Haven’t Been Updating Here


Monday, 07.21.2014

I’m back!

Well, not really…

Well, maybe…

I don’t know.

The past few years, my presence on The Media Maid has been dwindling. As more and more bloggers sprout up over the internet, more and more “look at me” social media mongers clammered for likes and comments, I’ve all but pretty much disappeared here on my beloved blog. Sure, every once in awhile, you’ll be treated to an emo heartbreak post or a random pop culture piece but most generally, I cannot say I’ve been the most active of bloggers.

Not because I haven’t been writing, you see. I had a stint for awhile at a magazine, I still contribute and help out with some other sites and I still put pen to paper the old fashioned way all the time in my journal but in a weird way, the more I had to write professionally, the less I wanted to write blogically.

Why?

Well, here are just a few of the reasons:

Being a professional writer sapped my creativity

I know this sounds a little bit idiosyncratic. After all, shouldn’t getting paid to write be the dream of any writer? Shouldn’t the accessibility to a computer and blank Word document throughout most of the day as well as being in an environment with like-minded individuals actually help boost my writing prowess?

Well, it did back when I was writing part-time. Because the other parts of my days, I was able to spend it daydreaming and conjuring up weird content to put on my own blog – stuff like being afraid of trees and hate mails to mosquitos. When I started writing full time – 10am-7pm 5 times a week (but usually much longer than that), the last thing I wanted to go home and face was my computer screen. Again.

I faced a lot of big, scary critics.

Granted, most of them were in my head. I had gotten to a point where I kept listening to everyone else about what I should do with my blog. Ebert over there is muttering about how I need to quit sharing all the goofs and mishaps I get myself into while Roeper all the way down there is yammering about how they wished I would be less wordy. It started creating a major writer’s block in me because I just didn’t know what to write about that could please everyone who read this thing. I stopped listening to that voice inside my own head, that gut instinct that told me what was cool and what was not, what was worthy to write about and how to write about it.

I was trying to kick my bad habit.

I’m a really bad big mouth. This bad habit could be as harmless as sometimes I just don’t think certain pieces of information are that big of a deal to share with other people but I didn’t really consider other people’s feelings and sensitivities. This bad habit could also be as grave as I grew up having a serious void in my heart and a need for attention and my way to get that attention and fulfill that void was to share gossip. These past few years have been a gradual but intentional purging of my big-mouthedness. Not blogging regularly on my personal blog about the comings and goings of my life has definitely helped with that process so yes! Some rainbow finally popped out of that dreary old thunderstorm!

Instagram.

As my Instagramming habit increased, it just became easier to take one or two pictures that stuck out to me during the Ambien Online day and share a little bit about my musings on it rather than plot out a whole entry that has a succinct beginning, middle and end. I succumbed to my generation’s need to share everything right now, right away and became too lazy to work my brain muscles out with the sometimes painful process of brainstorming and marinating on a good, long, in-depth topic or theme and then actually typing that out.

Identity Issues.

A lot of the past two years has been devoted to some serious soul searching. Drawing out where my identity lies and how it defined my actions and behaviors in positive or negative ways. So much of my life has been about doing something to carve out that identity. I’d somehow believed deep down inside that if I portrayed a life that looked pretty and sparkly and just charmingly slightly disarrayed, then that was who I was inside. Or also that my identity was based on how well-received my blog was or how many people would email or comment or like each blog entry. I didn’t really want to be beholden to that anymore. Even if I don’t write regularly, I’m still Janice… beloved by my Creator and made for greatness and freedom in ways I can’t even fathom (also created for a bit of big-headedness, huh?). No funny entry, witty anecdote or eye-catching photo can ever make up for that.

So yea… in a nutshell, I guess those are most of the reasons for the lack of life found on The Media Maid. I think most likely, I just kind of got annoyed by myself and my excessive sharing. Funny enough, to the right of my blog’s homepage, this is my writer’s profile, right underneath a eager beaver smiley photo of me in a bubblegum pink t-shirt:

I have this problem. I have a need to share with the world my passions and interests and hope that they will also enjoy it. Hence, this blog is born- to showcase some of the things I’m most fascinated with. Most of the posts relate to the media as it relates to me. (Blame the early twenties neurosis of thinking the world revolves around you)

The late-twenties Janice reads those sentences and think, “Oh god, how utterly annoying, naive and young this chick is. (Cute smile though)”

So after aaaaaall the reasons why I didn’t want to blog on The Media Maid anymore, why this post?

Well, I kind of missed this old friend. I was looking through old photos the other day and I thought, “Wow. I’ve made some incredible memories over the past few years. I’ve had some great people in my life and some grand adventures.” But because I hadn’t been blogging that much these past few years, I’ve sadly almost forgotten about these good times (and some bad times).

Keeping my memories afloat on The Media Maid has given me a most valuable gift – treasure troves of stories and incidentals and thoughts and musings that can help me reflect on my past, present and even what I presumed my future would be. And now that my knowledge of my true identity is more firm and in place than ever before, I feel I can write and share from a place that’s less beholden to my critics and bad habits and fears.

So who knows? Perhaps I’ll be updating more frequently from now on? Perhaps I’ll be shifting how I write and what I write about? Not sure what the future will hold but for here, for now, here is a post.

 
posted by Janice | Comments: 3 | Category Blog, Inspirations, Writing

Bringing Christmas Back


Tuesday, 12.13.2011

My family’s hitting that awkward age where all the children have grown up and adults feel like there’s no need for getting into the Christmas spirit anymore. Like, we all know Santa doesn’t exist so why decorate the tree? And why wrap presents when you can just give cash in a red envelope?

Well, I say nay to that! Nay to that!

First, I hung a wreath up on our doors (lights will hopefully come later once I find out a) how to hang them b) how to light them without getting myself electrocuted). It’s just the right cheery touch to welcome someone in.

Next up, I intended to revive postal services again by mailing a few of my dearest with Christmas love. Who doesn’t like receiving mail, right?

I didn’t plan a good system this year though. Post-it lists and using mailing labels 5 sizes too big do not pretty Christmas cards make. Next year, I’ll try harder!

I even started doing some gift wrapping! I really do love gift wrapping. I should open my own gift wrapping business. Any takers?

And a present to all my dear blog readers…a revamped Media Maid layout thanks to the talented Modeh!

May your Christmas be bright. :)

PS. Just learned this week that Christ was NOT born on Dec. 25th! Nonetheless, his love is so real and deep, hallelujah!

 
posted by Janice | Comments: 0 | Category Blog, Personal

I Love Ebay!


Wednesday, 11.30.2011

Thanks to maid of honor duties for Miss Helena, a very important one consists of picking out THE perfect maid of honor dress.

Because this is Helena we are talking about, no pastel concoction purchased from Macy’s will do (although if you did find your dress from there, kudos to you!). I decided to venture to Ebay for my shopping needs.

And I got hooked.

At first I wasn’t really sure how to use this complicated e-commerce site and ended up bidding on a whole bunch of dresses in the same color and style just because I can. And then I realized, “Oh crap! I actually have to pay for them!”

But I’m slowly growing into a sophisticated Ebay shopper, picky about my merchandise, savvy when bidding.

The best part would have to be when the package arrives in the mail.

So of all the things I’ve already bought on Ebay, (which is not a lot, okay? I don’t have like, a whole secret closet stuffed with lawn chairs, owl watches, and juicers) my favorite would have to be this:

Guess what this is! Guess what this is! Okay, I’ll tell you.

‘Tis a monopod!

This contraption holds up my iPhone and smaller cameras and I get to wave it around and film people!

Here is a ROUGH first video:

What do you think? Do I have what it takes to be the next Steven Spielberg? (And I’d just like to state for the record that the shakiness and the blurred video image is an artistic choice, okay?)

 
posted by Janice | Comments: 8 | Category Blog

Thank Goodness It’s Thanksgiving!


Wednesday, 11.23.2011

My most memorable Thanksgiving took place two years ago, in a hospital, with a beautiful baby.

It was my first year out of college and my FUNemployment adventures led me to taking care of this adorable tot who taught me how short life is and how blessed I am.

Two years later, I look at my surroundings and I think about how even more blessed (if that’s possible) I am. I’m working as the assistant editor for Audrey Magazine — a job I’ve dreamt about since I was 12 – and I get the opportunity to shape Asian American lifestyle and culture.

In the mere 1+ year I’ve been working here, I’ve gotten the opportunity to meet and converse with many public figures I’ve admired. Not naming names but Mindy Kaling, JustJared‘s Jared Eng, Lisa Ling, and Kal Penn among the many.

Like this picture below. For years I would obsessively listen to the voice of Dia Frampton from the indie pop-rock band Meg & Dia. I still have their CDs in my car. And look, here I am being all buddy buddy with her at her most recent KoreAm Journal cover shoot!

When we’re not out on the field, I get to goof off work with some of the most interesting people on this planet: my co-workers. Some hi jinks include pampering my co-worker Peter’s skin and BBQ-ing in the rain.

When we’re not in the office, we STILL enjoy eachother’s company and often hold Happy Hours together. Here, some fine ladies and gents strike a pose with my Hello Kitty glasses.

Can I say I’m always 100% happy with where my career is headed? No. I’m a spoiled brat who suffers from the what if’s. “What if I made more money?” “What if I interviewed more relevant subjects?” “What if I had a job where I drove less?”

As our society gets more and more progressive, I’ve noticed — at least around many of my peers — that what we’re seeking are the jobs with the fattest paychecks, the positions that will enable us to climb the corporate ladder, the occupations that will make us seem the most stable, the most normal.

As important as all those things may be, I know that I will never be able to work in a place that I lack passion for. Never be able to handle a position where I feel the need to complain all the time. So I’m so thankful I’ve always been able to know when my time is up and I’ve had understanding employers that I can leave on good terms with.

And I’m super grateful with my position here and for these hooligans who are passionate about their jobs and what they put out into the world.

In addition to Audrey Magazine, other things I’m thankful for (in no particular order besides the fact that they came out of my head this way):

  • *My family including my mother who stews delicious hot soup for me, my father who fixes broken car door handles for me, my abu who remind me everyday how lucky I am, my sister who worships the ground I walk on (keke) and every other kin in between for being so beautiful inside and out.
  • *Jason for introducing me to Sovereign Grace where I get my brain kicked every week over how great Jesus’ love is and how deeply I sin.
  • *My insatiable drive and my stubborn optimism. It makes me miserable a lot of the times but I know this is what’s going to take me to my destiny.
  • *My awesome friends who are so frickin’ busy and so frickin’ artsy and so frickin’ loving to me, tolerating my ditziness/flakiness/big-mouthedness.
  • *And of course, I’m thankful for youuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!! <3
 
posted by Janice | Comments: 4 | Category Blog, Friendlies, Inspirations, Job, Los Angeles, Magazine, Personal, Writing

Oh Happy Day!


Sunday, 09.4.2011

One of the best classes I took during my undergrad at UCLA was this Gospel Choir class every Friday morning.

At that time, I had just wanted something fun and the class was fun, indeed.

With a teacher behind the pianos, we went through gospel songs celebrating and appreciating God. At that time, an atheist me just found the songs to be delicious to sing and dance to. Let the hands clap! Let the voices tremor! Gospel Choir easily became the one class I most looked forward to every week, even though it meant I would actually have to wake my butt up and get to campus every Friday.

Now, I can see that I was being drawn to the light and to the Lord because it is inherently right to be praising the Lord for all that He has done for us and for all that He is.

And I know I’m not the only one who thinks so.  WitnessLA posted about Jesus showing up at Oprah’s Legends Ball earlier this summer. Take a look. It’s moving.

Happy Sunday, all!

 
posted by Janice | Comments: 4 | Category Blog, God, Inspirations, Love, Music, TV

Getting Lost Will Help You Find Your Way


Friday, 08.19.2011

This poster isn’t even that original. All the statements are common sense or have been found elsewhere. It’s easy to read and get inspired but it’s another thing altogether to take it into your heart and truly LIVE YOUR LIFE this way.

The one that’s shouting out at me is: “Travel often; getting lost will help you find your way.”

I’m overswamped with work. I have plenty of friends here that I need to catch up with. I have family that I should be spending more time with. I really don’t have any money to be spending on a plane ticket.

But I’m going to Vancouver this weekend. Bags packed, passport in the pocket, plane ticket bought.

I’m hoping the fresh Canadian scenery, the lack of laptop and cell phone, and the long-amissed faces and conversations of my cousin, Liz and friend, D, will be what I need to rejuvenate my soul. Will update my adventures (hopefully, there are plenty!) on here when I get back.

What are you all up to this weekend?

 
posted by Janice | Comments: 2 | Category Blog, Friendlies, Inspirations, Travel

How To Procrastinate Properly


Wednesday, 07.6.2011

Nuts…

 
posted by Janice | Comments: 2 | Category Blog, Job, Magazine, Writing

Snapshot Of My Day: So It’s Not In Vain


Thursday, 06.9.2011

I really liked my makeup today but unfortunately, plans to LA fell through and I was stuck working for the rest of the evening so the only thing that got to stare at my face was my computer screen(s) and my family (who don’t count ’cause they always think I’m beautiful).

But now I get to make all my blog readers stare at my face! Yay! (Please don’t unsubscribe…)

Haha, you can see how thick my glasses are by how small they shrink the sides of my face.

 
posted by Janice | Comments: 3 | Category Blog, Personal

A Work In Progress


Tuesday, 05.31.2011

This blog, like myself, is always a work in progress.

I’m so blessed to have my good friend Mohamad constantly helping me tweak to make The Media Maid more visually and technically appealing.

As you can see, new changes have been made (Cleaner banner head! Ads! (Welcome BlogHer!) and more changes are soon to come.

Your thoughts are always of utmost importance. I mean, after all, I don’t write on a public blog for myself only. I obviously want people to read it. So please let me know what I can do to improve this blog for you and for me.

…No naked pictures. I’ll leave that to the celebs. *wink wink

 
posted by Janice | Comments: 2 | Category Blog

I have this problem. I have a need to share with the world my passions and interests and hope that they will also enjoy it. Hence, this blog is born- to showcase some of the things I'm most fascinated with. Most of the posts relate to the media as it relates to me. (Blame the early twenties neurosis of thinking the world revolves around you). (More..)

Email: jjann[at]themediamaid.com
Facebook: facebook.com/mediamaid
Twitter: @themediamaid

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